Up until very recently, I struggled with this notion that if I did not get married and have kids, I would not be leaving a legacy behind. I needed the comfort of knowing that my biological seed would carry on our family history and traditions. I wanted to know that my son or daugther would be persistent in keeping the family reunions alive and well, even when family decided that other things were so important. I feared being this old woman in a nursing home with no one to come visit me to make sure I was not being abused. Yeah I know, I took it all the way there. But for me that is what Legacy meant. I felt it even more as I was the funeral of Senator Edward Kennedy on CNN with his children and grandchildren all there to share stories of this person that they just called Dad or Grandpa.
And then Dr. Height died last week. She never married. She never had her own children. But here was this woman who left this gigantic legacy behind. I watched the Honorable Alexis Herman fight tears back as she talked about her dear friend whom she said told her "I started on a journey to never take myself out the game." I can only imagine the countless women and men who crossed her path who looked to her for guidance as they would a parent. I can only imagine that she formed close "relationships" with those she mentored such as Secretary Herman.
As the pool of our civil rights leaders from the past are slowly dying, it really is up to our generation to remember the past and mentor and mold this new young generation. You know the young generation I am talking about. The one where all the kids are on the metro talking loud and cussing each other out at the same time. The one where they never say thank you but still expect a Wii for their birthday. The ones who are barely making it out of school high school and not realizing the importance of getting a higher education.
So I am not married and I do not have any biological children, but look at all the ways I can give back to leave some kind of legacy. How great it would be to know that after talking to one young girl, she decided it was not a good idea to let some raggedy boy take her virginity? What if after talking to some young boy, he decided he would do better than average in school so that he could get scholarships to go to college? What if there was a place young girls could come to learn how to talk, walk and dress like ladies instead of being brainwashed by Nicki Minaj's of the world?
President Obama said in his eulogy for Dr. Height, "Let's honor her life by Changing the World."
Thank you Dr. Height! I START MY JOURNEY!
As a single woman with no children who is breathing down 40's back, I have also had these same thoughts. Especially when I see people I have mentored marry and have children. I've been left to wonder if my life truly has any meaning. But thank you for highlighting how we can still leave a legacy. How we are not to be pitied but how we can be life changers for others using your examples or taking it one step further by fostering or adopting children. I needed to read this blog today. Thanks for speaking.
ReplyDeleteP.S. - I had to google Nicki Minaj, because I had no idea. LOL